I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. So when I told old Spencer I had to go to the gym to get my equipment and stuff, that was a sheer lie. I don't even keep my goddam equipment in the gym.
I live in the Ossenburger Memorial wing of the new dorms. It was for juniors and seniors. I was a junior. My roommate was a senior. It was named after this guy Ossenburger that went to Pency. What he did, he started these undertaking business after parlors all over the country that you could get your family buried for about five bucks a piece. He probably just shoves them in a sack and dumps them in a river. Anyway, he gave Pencey a pile of dough, and the named our wing after him.
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